Sunday 28 March 2010

Trains




Trains have something magical.
There's no denying that, contrary to, say, the car,
travel by train has something special, unique.
The rhythm of the tracks, the sound of the engines, the wheels turning.



Turning.

Turning.

And then this shit happens.


You turn into a an old chinese man?

You fall asleep.
Now, I have no problem with falling asleep in general, but sleeping on a train is a bother.
First things first: practicality. When you're asleep, you have the tendency not to get off at the right stop.
But when you wake up, it's like a form of being hungover.
You wake up.
Your mouth feels like you've been chewing aluminum foil.
Your throat is sore.
And then reality kicks in. It's dark. It wasn't dark before, was it?
You have no idea where you are.
You go through the mental steps:
I'm on a train. Okay. I've got my bags with me. Check your wallet. Got it (in a worst case-scenario, you might want to check your passport, just to check on your name).
And now, things start to get fun.
Where was I going? Check the ticket. Ohh...
now... where am I?

You are here. The middle of nowhere

Looking out the window is pointless. It's either pitch-black, or the area around the train is nondescript. God forbid landscapes to be recognizable.
So you kinda look around for someone that you might recognize from before.
Noone. So you decide to wait until the next stop.
Nothing! You've never heard of this little hole of a town.
And then Eureka! The voice in the train starts talking! It'll tell you the name of your future destinations.
"Ladies and gentlemen. harghbhfffm. ffmmphbrrrrg. brahbhgabrhhaa. Thank you."


Peek-a-boo
Imagine all this, with the conductor standing next to you, with a patience that can outlast tectonic plates. Of course, at this point you've realized you're heading for the final destination, and there's no way for you to miss your stop, but that hasn't stopped everyone in the train from knowing about your little mishap. You sheepishly give him your ticket, he looks at you like you just exclaimed that you "almost failed on your IQ test, but finally succeeded anyway."

So, what ever you do... don't... fall... asleep...

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