Gangway!

There are several ways of traversing through crowds. It depends on the crowd. Say you want to get on a train, but everyone is getting off the train and walking towards the station. There's a stampede coming your way (albeit one moving at a glacial pace, but still), and there's few ways you can go forward without taking the occasional step backward or elbow to the nose.

So here's my tip on how to safely and easily split the crowd all moses-like.

Requirements: either a large or broad posture, a leather jacket or Ron Pearlman's head.

The trick is to walk forward, and will the bastards to step aside. Do not at any point make eye contact. That would lead to a game of chicken. Stare at a point on the floor about 15 meters in front of you. Unless you meet a bunch of first-graders, you won't make eye-contact once. You have to give the impression that you are going the other way, regardless of what might be in your way. You're a force of, if not nature, then at least of heavy steam-powered machinery. People will generally swerve out of the way.

Added bonus: you might be a prick for doing so, but you'll feel awesome as heck. Plus, you can always swerve when others refuse to.

ANFSCD:

A bit of a wtf, and I need some help decyphering a piece of code. The code is human interaction, of which I get less than I thought.

Here's the situation:

- Someone I know makes coffee.

- They offer me coffee.

- I say no, but thanks anyway.

So far so good, right?

- Looks at me as if I made a fart joke. "Oh, you!"

Now what the hell happened here? Is there a rule that you don't reject coffee? I mumbled some stuff about being bad at getting jokes and scurried off. It was the weirdest conversation I've had in a while.